My divine family... (Only My Kiks not with us😢)
My divine family… (Only My Kiks not with us😢)

So today was a really bad day with my speech! Fortunately only my immediate family knows my prognosis so I am sure no-one is aware of it! I hear the frustration in Mike’s voice but I realize he does not put two and two together so I let it go. Note to myself ……. Write letter to Jan and kids to have patience and forgive me when I am slow! My friend Nicola drove us to school today to Parent/Teacher meeting and to fetch Scott and Mike. This because last night I had a black out and Jan came home to me sprawled on the floor and the dog’s going mad. Don’t know how long, don’t know what happened but when I woke up I was on the floor,with Jan holding me. I was fine after that, guess I was just exhausted, I had felt dizzy all day. My dogs were really in a state if you can believe that and cried and followed me around all evening. Max slept next to my bed, almost on top of me, and continues to be even more vigilant about where I am and where I am going. Poor thing traumatized.

So Jan said I will not drive…… So I listened. Hate what I am putting him through, hate that I am so useless at the moment. I went up to three times looking for things today, and back and forth trying to remember what I went for in the first place, well at least I am getting exercise. My neck is what hurts now, not so much my arm……. Must mean I am getting better, well my arm is certainly moving a lot more. Yippee!

Reading “Finding Alice” about a woman at 50 diagnosed with early Alzhymer’s. So very sad, she deteriorates so quickly, I pray to God that won’t be me……… I pray to God my family listens to me when I say they need to put me in a home and not be my caregivers when I don’t know what is going on around me. I wish to be remembered as the person I am…….. NotThe person I have become with AD……. How awful!

Hoping for a better day tomorrow. Still a good day today as pain subsiding day by day!!!!!

Advertisements