I have been trying so hard to feel better about my pain with regards to my shoulder and neck but just when I feel it is getting better, the pain comes back with a vengeance. My right arm is almost fully functional now but my neck is in agony. So right now I am thinking maybe I should just bite the bullet and see the specialist for a professional diagnosis. It just seems it is never going to end. I am trying so hard not to show my sweet hubby Jan that I am not in pain, he worries and truly cares for me and I hate the fuss!

I went to town this morning and needed frames removed from my car and could not for the life of me remember Bernard’s name. I wanted to call him and until my gardener said his name it was gone. Five years Bernard has been with us as a loyal guard……. Blank, nothing, zip. Biggest telltale sign for AD for me….. Forgetting names of people I know well!

IMG_6203I finished “Finding Alice” last night. Brilliant, her speech in the book at the end to an audience is phenomenal, I will post it here at a later date. The thing about this book is it tells the story of a woman with early onset AD and how she feels. It’s accurate for someone like me, but very very scarey because she goes downhill very very quickly! Not enough time for me, not nearly enough time! Also my family will not handle it, and I will not expect them to. They have got to put me In a home. I know it will kill Jan slowly, and I cannot bear to do that to him…………..